do or die

I am not sure how it came about, but I now know exactly what I have to do. I have a feeling that I won't be able to do it perfectly, but it's the ideal that I will be striving toward. Maybe everything I've been reading lately and everything that I've learned about addiction over the years coalesced into one "unified theory" of my existence.
Sugar and grains. Bad for me. I crave them to the point of insanity. I don't care if I can't breath because I've had wheat too much, I will have more and take an anti-histamine. Weight piling on like there's no tomorrow. All of my old rules being broken without too much regret: fast food drive thrus, donuts, frosted cakes, pizza (not gluten free), giving my daughter the same crap I've been eating.
I hesitated to write it down, my new way of being, because I suspect that by this point I have lost credibility. But, a couple of days in a row of no sugar and no grains and I felt more full of life and less hungry. Of course, I was up almost every hour with my daughter until my husband got up at 6am and woke up the baby. 1 1/2 gluten free bagels later...
I made it until the early afternoon before I and my resolve shredded. But I am not giving up. This is actually a matter of life and death. First emotional and spiritual, and then physical more quickly that one might imagine.