prayed

This afternoon I was trying to nap when I got a call from my sick friend's husband. He needed to cancel an appointment with my spouse because they were still in the hospital. As we said goodbye, he said, "Keep praying." And I think because my rational mind was still napping, I got this idea to pray for a miracle. So I prayed, "God, please heal M. If anyone deserves it, she does. Please heal her. Please." And I felt a twinge of faith. What if it could actually be? People heal. Spontaneous remission.
All I'm saying is, it's not over until it's over.

And at the same time, I have been stuffing my face with dairy and gluten free cupcakes which don't have wheat but have evaporated cane juice. Yes. It's pretty much sugar. Not quite the heroin that is white sugar, but close enough for government work.
So again, I begin. I need to be more careful about what I put in my mouth because it is a slippery slope. I find that I am right on the line between obsession and clarity.