gone

She's gone now. Margie now knows what happens after you die. And I know that I can survive around 6 hours and 42 minutes without her on the planet.
Though I did eat Chinese food: deep fried flour with red dye sugar syrup and a fortune cookie or two. Guess what my fortune is: You will receive good news today.
OK.
A sugar binge is on the way, lurching through the darkness with a promise of oblivion followed by enough self loathing to effectively distract me from the hurt in my heart.
I am bewildered. I am angry. I am afraid of how powerful this feels. Last night I had dreams that huge crocodiles with red eyes were bursting through the floor boards of my house on the water. I had a pitch fork and was fighting them off one at a time.